Modernity and the Consumption of Ideas

The “vertigo of existence” is simply Berman’s way of saying “angst.” I’ve experienced my share of it, too—that feeling of your foundation sweeping away when your worldview is confronted, my stomach falling away when a relationship goes sour, a sudden light-headedness when you stand up too fast after a philosophical debate.

Those who opt out of our self-centered modernity—or those who pretend to—distinguish themselves as ‘emo’ or ‘nonconformist’ with long, eye-shielding hair and black nail polish. They spend their consumer dollars on band t-shirts at Hot Topic instead of blazers at J. Crew, and they still seem convinced it’s the world vs. them.

Why are we in such a rush to define ourselves? Why is it- sincerely- so hard to float through life? Entering and existing relationships with objects, places, and people give us vague data points on the role with play in the world. Intimacy with other human beings pierces through the things we consume, but we consume together to build intimacy.

Even subscribing to certain beliefs or values is consuming a message—existentially the same as buying into a brand’s image.

You can try too hard, but it’s not really possible to stop trying, unless you are seriously depressed and spend your time sobbing in bed instead of putting on clotehs and walking to class. After all, putting on any kind of clothing (or lack thereof) is inviting others to judge you and the signs you’re sending into society.

The good news is that you do define yourself- do you smile or sigh when you get out of bed? Get coffee or tea in the morning? Flip flops or Ugg boots with your sweatpants? Plastic sunglasses or Ray Ban aviators or Tom Ford investment pieces?

And then others ask questions and judge your decisions. Who were you spotted with this weekend? Were you sloppy drunk or stone sober Are you a fixture in the library or a social butterfly?

And there are the questions we all, inevitably, grapple with ourselves: Who am I? Who do I want to be? What kind of story do I want to tell?